I miss Football.
Not in the "back in my day, I could run circles around these pros with their long hair and loud music...I miss getting on the field and hitting people" way.
I never played organized football (baseball was my sport), so that's not what I'm talking about.
I don't miss it in the "it's March, the pro-bowl is just a memory and I've got to wait HOW LONG for training camp to open???" sense either.
So how, and more importantly, why, in the middle of an interesting season, with plenty of controversies (T.O. anyone), surprises (the Bears?? are you kidding me?) and great teams playing greatly (the Colts, for those not paying attention) would I cry and wail about missing football?
Well, it's simple really.
I don't have a "team" anymore.
Growing up in San Diego, I was one of the biggest Chargers fan you could find. It took a while, the early-mid 70's were a big wasteland, for the most part, and I was too young to appreciate the John Hadl, Lance Allworth (and Johnny Unitas) teams, but in 1973, the team drafted a young QB out of Oregon by the name of Dan Fouts, and all of San Diego Charger's history took a brave new step. Of course, the coach, Don Coryell was the main architect of this new team, but Fouts was the bearded face and new stud that would re-write the record books.
It took a few years, but I was in 7th grade and had plenty of time to nurture my fan-dom.
I would watch every Sunday and although my mood depended on how the game would turn out, I wasn't quite a "live, die and bleed" fan at this time, and "we" didn't have any recent history and heartbreak (yet) that scarred me. I was an innocent fan, enjoying the game and players, getting bummed when they lost, and looking forward to the next game...
Then they started to get better.
In '75 they were 2-12 (ugh!), but each year after, they showed marked progress:
76: 6-8
77: 7-7
78: 9-7 (Coryell's first year)
79: 12-4 (Now we're talking!)
80: 11-5 (still going strong)
81: 10-6 (1 game away from the Super Bowl...AGAIN!)
That 79-81 run is still etched into my memory. Fouts, JJ Jefferson, Chuck Muncie, Wes Chandler, Louie Kelcher, Gary "Big Hands" Johnson, Ed White, Kellen Winslow, Charlie Joyner, Rolf Binerschke. All names from my childhood.
That damn "
Super Chargers" song. I loved that
song.
This is when they broke my heart. I cried in '79 when they lost that playoff game against the Oilers...the OILERS!!! Cried like a baby. That was OUR year. We had beaten both Super Bowl teams, Rams and Steelers, and nobody was going to stand in our way. Well, the Oilers did, I guess. I would never be the same. This was my first sports heartache.
Anyway...what I'm getting at here is that I no longer feel that connection to the Chargers...or any team. A couple of reasons why:
I moved away from SD. That's not the whole reason because when I was living in Arizona, I was still a huge Charger's fan. They went to the Super Bowl because of me (I moved out of SD, thus reducing the pressure on the team to perform well.)
I moved to SF, where I got caught up in 49'er fever!!!!! Not the full reason either.
I never liked the Niners, mostly because of their obnoxious fans and the fact that they won all the time, but I got accustomed to their faces, I guess. And as Steve Young got older, I started to respect the team a bit more, and I finally fully jumped ship when Jeff Garcia took over as QB. But still, I'm a fan, but not a die-hard fan, and now that they are especially bad, I've found plenty of other things to do on Sundays. Maybe I'm one of those (gasp!) bandwagon fans, only there when the team is doing well.
Or maybe I've grown up, found other priorities, and moved on to a happier place.
Or maybe, it's because of fantasy football. I think that's it. I like players, not teams, root for individuals, not teams, pay attention to stats, not won-loss records...
I guess that, like life, it's a combination of those things. I'll keep you posted.