Tuesday, August 30, 2005

Fantasy Draft

I just came back from the annual USFL fantasy football draft.
USFL stands for "Unnecessary Stressful Football League" and it certainly is.
I got involved in this about 18 years ago and it's been quite a wild ride. In my case, "wild" means never winning this damn league, but I still give it the ol' college try.
Sure, I've had my share of great games...Moon and Slaughter in '89 comes to mind, plus the Warner to Everyone in '99 always brings a smile to my face. The smile goes away upon remembering the debacle that was Everett to god-knows-who in '88.

Let's just say, I'm due.

But this year, this year I say, I'm gonna win the whole enchilada. Or whatever the prize is this year, it changes from year to year and I'm really hoping for the enchilada...with mole' sauce, and fresh cheese...mmmmmmmmmmm. I'm veering off track, again.


The draft itself was the usual Roman orgy of testosterone, insults, meat and alcohol, but since I don't drink anymore, it's just not the same. Sure, I was able to alter my consciousness other ways, but without the gentle lubrication of the devil's rain, I couldn't be as...well, stupid, as the rest of the gang.

Eventually it became a "make fun of what the last person just said", so we (they) were just repeating something someone else just said, but laughing while they said it, again. This went on for hours.

"I'll take Johnson"
"He said that he'll take his Johnson."
(hahahahaha)
"take his Johnson where" (hahahaha)
"Johnsonwhere...it what you cook your johnson in" (hahahaha...actually pretty funny)
"cooking Johnsons...that's my team name" (and it is)
"what team does Cookie Johnson play for" (actual question)

and so on...for hours.


When I could drink, this was great fun...but now...not so much. I tried to make the best of it. Seeing a bunch of old friends made this pretty tolerable, so I didn't whine, complain, or shake my fist at the gods...plus, I knew what I was getting into.



Anyhooo...
It was a typical draft. I made fun of other peoples picks, tried to keep the draft moving forward (not drinking made this easy for me) and make sure that everyone else had a full beer or cocktail. Hmmm, the more everyone else drinks, the greater chance that they'll draft Onterrio Smith or Gus Frerotte. You'd think I'd be able to take better advantage of this. I can't believe I had never really thought about it this way. I can't wait for next years draft!

So, I've got a pretty good team. I was able to fill the holes that needed filling and I'm feeling good about myself...because I'm defined by my team's ability to win, or not win as the previous 18 years attest.


So, without much further ado... (does that look right, "further ado"? it looks weird...whatever, the more I stare at it, the less it looks like English)
Here's my team:

QBs (2) Favre, D Carr
RBs(4) D Davis, C. Dillon, T. Jones, R. Brown
WRs (5) D Driver, R Wayne, TJ Houshmanzadah, K Colbert, B Lloyd
TE (2) M Pollard, H Miller
K (2) M Stover
Def (2) Denver, Tampa

Yes, I'm missing a kicker, so sue me! (I just noticed that) No big deal. There are plenty of back-up kickers that I can choose from.
Now I just have to wait 2 weeks for the season to start. There's that stupid (STUPID!!!! Don't get me started on this) Thursday night opening game, and then the deluge starts on the following Sunday. So, to my wife, friends and family...you've only got 2 more Sundays of me before I disappear into the void. Make them count!

Friday, August 26, 2005

Friday NIght Itunes Shuffle

It's Friday night, and time for its joey's first-ever Friday Night Dance Party.

It's so simple, anyone can do it!
Just fire up your itunes, select "party shuffle" and see what comes up. (no "do-overs", you have to live with what comes up)
It's a great, if shallow, way to find out about someone and show off your coolness, or lack of it.

So, here goes...read as much into it as you'd like.

Don't Push --Sublime
Going Back to Cali --LL Cool J
Eternal Life -- Jeff Buckley
Love on Your Side -- Thompson Twins
Mama Said Knock You Out --LL Cool J (again?!)
Straight To The Man -- The Stone Roses
5D (Fifth Dimension) -- The Byrds
Mountains O' Things -- Tracy Chapman
Gay Sera Sera -- Kinsey Sicks
Love and Affection--Joan Armatrading
From Under the Covers -- The Beautiful South

Ok, not too bad. Nothing to be ashamed of, and I'm a lot cooler in music than in real life. Good for me.
I'm glad to see some of my favorites showing up tonight (Stone Roses, Sublime, Jeff Buckley, Joan) Welcome, have a seat, I've got some snacks and pop for you...

Monday, August 22, 2005

Dear Abby of the Real World

I used to read Dear Abby and Ann Landers when I was a kid, and I recently started reading them again. I always liked the car crash aspect of it, almost like listening to "Dr." Laura on the radio, but without the supersized judgment with extra guilt. I was curious to see the Abby/Landers take on our country's newfound conservatism and to see if they started to reflect this latest craze in their columns. From what I remembered, they both had the MYOB philosophy when it came to being offended by things that your neighbors were doing.

So on Friday I read this:
Dear Abby
"I live in a family-oriented neighborhood. My problem is my next-door neighbor flies his gay pride flag in his front yard. Because we have a lot of families with young children who do not need to be subjected to that kind of thing, I have asked him numerous times to remove it."

(it continues...)
"I strongly feel that in a neighborhood devoted to children's morals and the way life should be, he should not be allowed to have that flag in his front yard for everyone to see. I threatened if he didn't take it down, I'd call the police. I feel it's harming the children to see that flag flying, especially on a busy street that everyone travels on. What should I do?" -- RIGHTEOUS IN ...



Hmmm...I thought. Very clever of this writer to drop the charade and just say it like it is: Family-oriented = hate the gays.

I live in San Francisco. Gay couples with children are a fact. It is reality. Gay people get married all the time. Ok, don't call it marriage, whatever. But it happens in churches, synagogues, city hall, and numerous ballrooms, parks, beaches and private homes in SF (and all around the country). Closing your eyes doesn't make it go away. You either live in this world with the rest of us, or you watch your world get smaller and smaller every single day. Look at what's happened over the past 4 years. The president (Dubya) even said that he's ok with civil unions. Imagine that. He'll never actually do anything about it though, but it's on the record. What Vermont did a few years back is now the MODERATE position. Things move forward. Society moves forward. Sure, there are hiccups every now and then, (more now, but still...) but progress cannot be stopped. Even looking back from when I was in HS, the early 80's, seems like a foreign world in this regard. I had no clue how to react to the two boys making out at my school. I knew one of them from elementary school. I didn't like what they did, but I didn't know why, and I really didn't care. I also didn't like people who smoked and drank, and those Black Sabbath heavy metal guys were also on my list. Of course I went to college, appreciated some heavy metal music, drank and smoked and (no, not that) met some other guys who were gay.
It was all no big deal. I said "Whatever", alot.

So, back to Dear Abby. How's she going to play this? Pure "what about the children" fear and small-mindedness or "just the facts, ma'am." She didn't let me down.

"First of all, calm down."

A good start. Of course Abby needs to include the "unless there are codes or restrictions..." there's nothing you can do.
And then she adds:
"Rather than picking a fight about something so insignificant, you should concentrate on cultivating your own garden and stop obsessing about what's going on in his."

I think the kids call that a "smackdown." (or is it now "Pwn3d")



And yes, I'm "aware" of "my" problem.
I've got to "stop" using "the quotes."

Friday, August 19, 2005

An Appeal

Sure, like most rational, thinking, non-reactionary people, I try to keep an open mind and look at many sides of situations before I fly off the handle and scream my beliefs to strangers on the street.
So, I've been keenly watching the debate over teaching evolutionary theory in public schools. I've always held the opinion that evolutionary theory should be taught in science classes, but I'm starting to wonder if it's the "only" theory that explains how Man (the animal) came to be. So imagine my surprise when researching this topic, I came to find out that for some odd reason, people think that there are only TWO sides to this argument. Sure, Evolution has been accepted as fact in the scientific community, but who do these scientists think they are anyway, and what makes them qualified to talk about science?
I looked at the "other" side and found it lacking. Some old book, written, what, 4000 years ago? And that was it. No testing, no observable results, just "because it says so" and I cannot really get behind something like that.

So, I figured, that was it...but then I read about the OTHER, other side of this debate. No, not the Intelligent Falling vs. Gravity debate now going on at religious schools in the Midwest, but the newly published treatise on the previously unknown Flying Spaghetti Monster, so eloquently described in this open letter to the Kansas School Board.

It really makes you think.

Now there's some good blogging!

I like to scan a number of blogs during my days and nights and every now and then you run across a post that seems to (to use the overused term) "get it."

This comes from one of my favorite ranters, a guy who goes by the name of "driftglass" who almost every day has something new on his blog that should be spread far and wide.
If you're feeling down and need to vent, but just can't seem to find the right words, I'll give you this.

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

Funny Restaurant Stories

I was in the restaurant biz for over 15 years.
10 of those years were in management.
It was the best of times, and it was the worst of times. I'm glad I'm out, but some days I really miss it. I hope these stories will finally put out that flickering flame of desire that I sometimes see when I'm bored at my current job.


The Kids Eat Free nightmare:
I ran a Chili's clone restaurant in San Jose. We had a "Kids Eat Free" promotion every Tuesday night. Of course whenever you give away something for free, you must put some conditions on it to prevent the usual suspects from trying to take advantage of the situation. Some people don't like that.
We had 2 main conditions: One child per adult, and kids could only choose off of the kid's menu. Fairly simple, pretty obvious, and (I thought) idiot-proof.

But I was mistaken. First off, Tuesday night wasn't the most popular night to work. If you've ever worked in a restaurant, you'll remember that children can be the death of good service, good tips and good times at your job. Most parents don't realize this. They're usually too wrapped up in their kid's world to interact normally with the full-sized adults that run and work in restaurants. Sure, take care of your kids, make sure their needs are being met, but jeez-uuusssss, lift your head and look around.
YOU ARE NOT THE ONLY PEOPLE IN THE RESTAURANT.
Ok, great, got that off my chest.


Hey, I like kids, in theory. They serve a great purpose. They fill a void in many people's lives and some people (I've heard) actually want them. Good for them. Most kids seem to be well-behaved and normal. But when the parents realize that they don't have to make dinner AND clean up after themselves, some form of societal breakdown occurs and your typical, non-brain damaged parent turns into a full grown Veruka Salt.
"I WANT IT NOW!!!!!!!"

Back to the story...

It was our typical understaffed Tuesday night. Why understaffed? Because the previous management team never seemed to understand that Kids Eat Free night was going to be a busy night, so we were always "caught off guard" when we got really busy.(I was new at this place and I fixed this problem soon thereafter)

So, we've got a table of 2 moms and 7 kids. The menu states "one child per adult", the banner outside says "one child per adult" and all signage inside the restaurant says (wait for it...) "one child per adult."
We thought it was overkill.

I adjusted the bill to reflect the 2 free kids entrees and passed it back to the server. I started to move on to my next task, when...

"Notjoey, table 105 wants to talk to you."
"Great, is there a problem or are they really happy?"
"Problem. Kids eat free. Not enough meals taken off."
"Right, got it..." I put on my fake "feel your pain" smile and headed over to soothe the confused table.

Now I always play the ignorant friendly guy when I approach a table. Always smiling, and just playing a little bit dumb.
"Good evenin', folks, how's things goin' tonight?" I asked with a big friendly smile.
"You didn't take enough off of our bill."
"Hmmm...let's see." I was looking at the bill now. "Well, it appears correct, what seems to be the issue?"
"There are still 5 kids meals on the bill."
"Yes, we took off the 2 free meals. How was everything."
"It was fine, but the sign says kids eat free."
"Yes it does" I countered, slowly, "but it also says 'one child per adult'." This usually does the trick, not that it satisfies the tables, but they usually understand. Not this time.

"I don't understand. It says 'kids eat free' so why do we have to pay? What's the reason for all of these conditions?"
I kept up the dumb act and pulled out one of my tricks that I used to talk down to people, but in a way that doesn't quite seem like it.
"Obviously (people seem to hate that word) this prevents Mrs. Jones from bringing the entire 4th grade in for dinner, or the whole little league team from eating free. Wow, could you imagine if we did that? We'd be out of business so fast...or we'd just cancel the promotion, and we'd rather not do that."
"But it says KIDS EAT FREE."
I wasn't getting through to these people and usually I'd just let it go and move on, but this could set a precedent and we'd be full of people saying "but last week you let people break the rules, so why not us??????"
So I held firm.

"I'm terribly sorry, but the rules plainly state 'one child per adult' and we'd be dumb to start bending that rule every time someone didn't read the menu or signs properly." I was testing the table here. This was the point where they would either just say "ok" and pay up or make this into a real issue. As it stood now, it was just a difference of opinion.

"Well, we're not paying." The line in the sand had been drawn.
"Excuse me? You're refusing to pay your bill?" I was not expecting this. Parents usually do the right thing in the presence of children, but not this time.
"What are you going to do about it?" they asked. Ah, a challenge. I liked these. I could pretend to put them into our (fictitious) database of delinquent check writers, credit card forgers, fake id owners and the like...
"I'll just get your license plate number and report you to the police as someone who refused to pay their bill." Now we're getting serious.
"You can't do that!" They started to get up, setting some money on the table. "Here's money for OUR meals, and here's money for the server. She was good and shouldn't be punished for this."
"Well," I countered, "unfortunately she'll have to make up the difference out of her own pocket." I was lying.

They all got up and started to leave the restaurant. I walked with them outside, still saying, "You're refusing to pay your bill? I'm really surprised that you would make that choice, especially in front of the children."
Luckily for me, there were 2 police cars in the parking lot. I used this to my advantage.

"Great, Steve is here" pointing at the cop car, not knowing if "Steve" was the officer's name, "It'll be easy for me to file a report."
The parents were opening up the mini-van doors and trying to pile the kids inside.
"Now look here kids," I said, "when you're all grown up, you will learn that when you go out to dinner, you're supposed to pay for what you order and if you don't, it's called stealing." I could be a real prick when I wanted to be, and I really, really wanted to be at this point.
This hit a nerve with the parents. They both stopped loading up the mini-van and turned to me.
"Here...take this." It was more than enough money. I tried to tell them that I only needed the amount for the check, nothing more.
"Here...just take it."
"Thank you," I said, "And I'm sorry it had to come to this." I almost felt bad about how I handled this...but then I remembered that I was working and had a full restaurant that needed my attention. I didn't say "see ya again real soon" , though, so I should get a little credit.

I walked back into my crowded restaurant and was treated like a returning war hero.
I got the full check amount, got the server a nice tip, and got the respect of my staff for standing up for them.

Monday, August 15, 2005

Mecca III The Empire Strikes the Sith while Returning the Clones

OK, Even I'm tired of talking about this great journey that I had taken upon, on my way to becoming this all-knowing food guru. All I wanted was to write a simple little travelogue on one of my favorite places. This wasn't supposed to be some grand confessional on my life, and for that, I apologize. Maybe some day, when I'm all grown up, I'll be more "to the point" and less, well, not on point, and... (uh-oh, I can feel it coming on again...this urge to mention some bit of minutiae about my past....STOP!!!!)

Right, let's get on with it, shall we? It's your typical Saturday morning, you wake up ready to take on the day...

(oh, and click away on the links for some real information, straight from the vendors)

The SF Ferry Plaza and Farmer's Market are actually 2 seperate entities. The market is on Tuesday, Thursday eve, Saturday, and Sunday (though smaller on this day) while the Ferry Building Marketplace is open Sun-Sat, during regular business hours.

I usually go to the market on Saturday mornings, about 10ish, not too early, but before most of the lookie-loos arrive. The vendors are spread out along the front of the building and in the ferry landing area in the back. I like to start in the front, look around and see what's fresh and new this week, make my way to the back, and then walk through the interior of the building, picking up anything else that we might need.

Along the front we have various fruit vendors, my favorite being the apple guys, who supply me with my apples from August through May. Their Pink Ladies are the best. Crisp, sweet and tart. They always have some sliced for you to try.
Also, look for Sukhis Indian Foods. If you're hungry, this is a great stall to check out. If you're not careful, and the crowd is small, you can stuff yourself silly with the samples of curries, naan, chutneys, and samosas. Good stuff, plus they sell spice mixes, curry powders and pastes, and condiments so you can make your own food at home. From here, I'll head to one of the citrus farmers for an orange wedge, to cleanse the palate, of course. During winter, I might grab a pomelo or some grapefruit from these guys.

If you're a cheese fan, you'll be in heaven here. Some of the world's best artisan cheeses are produced in the Bay Area and most of them are sold by the cheese makers themselves at the Saturday market.

Let's assume that you bought some goat cheese. You'll probably want some good fresh bread and some local olive oil to accompany your purchases.

Work your way to the back of the building, but first stop here to sample the many dried fruits and nuts. My favorite are the dark chocolate covered toffee almonds.
Not quite the healthiest snack, but at least they're not deep fried.

Walk by the Marketbar Restaurant along the south end and make your way past the ferry docks to the back end of the building. You'll see the Rose Pistola stand, an outpost of the more famous sibling in North Beach. You might want to stop at the Blue Bottle Coffee kiosk for a cup of their outstanding filter drip coffee. It takes a bit longer, but it's worth the wait.
The scents in the air will change, from the fresh roasted smells of coffee, to the aroma of rosemary and roasting chicken. The Roli Roti "truck" will take you back to those small rotisseries in France with the rows of roasting chickens, their fat dripping down on to the potatoes, braising them in the flavors of all the herbs.
You'll get a glimpse of sunflowers, standing in buckets looking out, like puppies in kennels, waiting to be taken home to a good family. You turn the corner to see the rest of the market. It's larger in the back. There are more prepared food vendors out here, and there are tables along the bay to sit and relax on while you eat your oysters (try the sweetwaters),
or your tamales (from Primavera...I just love their black bean tortillas), or even a sausage sandwich.

There are plenty of fresh produce vendors out back too. In the spring, the English peas arrive, bags for 5 or 15 dollars, with the onion guy selling his red spring onions, still on the stalk, right next door. A bowl of peas, diced sweet onion, with a little butter or olive oil is so nice and easy to whip up when you get home.
Another spring treat is the asparagus. Not only do you get it straight from the farm, but they also sell and serve deep fried asparagus...it's like a tempura batter, with a sprinkle of parmesan cheese on top. It would make a great fair/carnival food.

Another thing, I guess I've got to give a "shout out" to my mom (hi mom!!) by including her favorite place at the market. Cap'n Mike's Holy Smoke. If you ever want to spend almost $40 for some of the best Lox you'll ever try, you'll be happy here.
Every time mom's in town, we have to go visit the Cap'n and stock up on his smoked fish. Since my parents are ex-New Yorkers, I've got to respect their opinion on all things deli.
For you non-smoked fish fans, you'll be happy to know that your needs will be met as well. During Salmon season (may-oct) Shogun Fish sells their self-caught salmon, right out of a cooler. It's just one guy, with one boat, in the water for 3 days at a time and he catches enough to sell at the market.
During the non-salmon months, Ports Seafood has a booth set up right next door, where they feature all seasonal seafoods, caught locally, resting on banks of crushed ice.

Browse among the many produce vendors for fresh (in season)chiles, fruit, and any other impulsive purchases before heading inside the Ferry Building for even more shopping.

Thursday, August 11, 2005

More about Me, Me, Me!!!!!

I saw this on another blog today (pops bucket...it's on my list, check it out)
and thought it made a good "ego driven self absorbed" type topic. Me, me, me, and more about me.

Number of records/tapes/CDs I own: let's see...I'd say about 450 cds. About 100 records/albums but they're hidden at the bottom of a closet, in a crate, near spiders, so I guess they're lost forever.

First record/tape/CD I bought: Album is Santana Abraxas. It's got naked ladies on the cover, plus the original versions of Black Magic Woman and Oye Como Va. I bought this album when I was seven. SEVEN!!! Not for the naked ladies though, at least not at that time. Later, when I was 12 I was able to fully appreciate the cover "art" and the message that Carlos and the band was trying to convey. I think it was "there are naked ladies on the cover, so buy this album"...but I really liked the song "Black Magic Woman."

First Single: a tie with "One Tin Soldier", "Baby I'm-a want you" (by Bread) and "Windy" by The Association. It was the early 70's and I was a small child, so no judging. Ok, NOW stop judging.
First CD: I'm not sure, but I think it was U2 Achtung Baby, back in 1992. Not quite sure though. I do remember having a small CD collection before I ever bought a CD player.

Last record/tape/CD I bought: Does Itunes count? I got the new Green Day, American Idiot album (I still call them albums, I don't think I'll ever change).
The latest video is out, it's quite good.

Last record/tape/CD I listened to: Dave Matthews Band, Live at Red Rocks. We're going to the concert at SBC Park on Saturday and needed to get in the right frame of mind.
I hate being the guy at concerts who only knows (or thinks he knows) some of the words to the songs. I also hate the idiots who know ALL the words, so it's a tightrope I'm walking here. Feel stupid, or be the idiot. Tough choices.

Recordings or songs that mean a lot to me (and/or changed my life):
It was 1980 and the music scene was changing. Journey, Foreigner, AC/DC and Van Halen where the huge groups at my HS, but there were also odd groups of kids, fresh from summer vacation, with strange haircuts, clove cigarettes and weird clothes. Most importantly, they were all connected by their love of these new groups that I had never heard of...Oingo Boingo, the Police, the Clash, Dead Kennedys, Ramones, Bauhaus, Joy Division.
Then I heard this song on the radio.
"Ping ping........Ping ping........chchchchchchch.........Ping Ping..........
Some-times I feel, I've got to (chch) run away, I've got to (chch) get away..."
Tainted Love, Soft Cell. It sounded like nothing else on the radio. It sounded cool, moody, mysterious, and I just knew that no one else at my school had heard of it. I wanted to hear more stuff like this.

The other life-changing song/album. "I Just Can't Stop It" by the English Beat.
I was hearing strange songs on the radio late at night and there was this sound that I couldn't let go of. Like Bob Marley, but not really. Light, syncopated drum beats, high-hat cymbals ts, ts, ts-ing in 16th notes on the upbeat. Sweet melodic voices and a heavily accented form of rap that I was unfamiliar with. I could not find out who this was. Joe Jackson? I think that's what the DJ said. I searched and found "Look Sharp" and loved it. But it wasn't what I had heard. Close in some songs. The beat was there, but the feel was different. The voice was different.
Then I heard another song. "Roxanne." Was this it? I loved the voice, it had the right beat, (and you could dance to it) but it still wasn't quite the sound. I thought that I must've misheard something on the radio, or got confused and was combining two groups or songs. Oh well. I loved that Police album. It would've been "the one" for me, except a few weeks later I was in the Wherehouse Records store in the local mall. I heard it again. The sound. It was real this time.
The opening baseline of "Mirror in the Bathroom" came rumbling out of the store's music system. I pulled my head out the "new wave" section where I was rummaging through all of the albums, hoping to find this mysterious band, and ran up to the counter.
"What IS this?"
"Some band from England," replied the guy behind the counter. "They're called The English Beat."
I bought the album and played the heck out of it. I made a tape of it and played it in my car. I looked around and found some imports that they had made. I noticed that they were part of this movement (and record label) called "Two-Tone" due partly to the fact that they and other groups on the label, were multi-racial. I bought "The Specials", "Madness", and "The Selector" albums. I saw "Dance Craze" at the midnight movie show. The music was called "ska" and I had found my sound. Now all I needed was a Vespa and a trenchcoat.

If I had to choose a soundtrack of my life, what 5-10 songs would be on it?:
For background music, I'd have to pick Mark Knopfler's, "Local Hero" soundtrack. The movie was one of the first "small movie showing the simple ways of English/Irish/Scottish small town life." The music was subtle and moody, simple guitar work, never in the way.

Songs:

Biko, Peter Gabriel...I still get chills when I hear this song, and it gives me a good excuse to hold a lighter over my head and wave it back and forth.

Please, Please Let Me Get What I Want, The Smiths...for when I'm feeling really crappy.

"So for once in my life
Let me get what I want
Lord knows, it would be the first time"


Waaaaaaaa!

What I like about you, The Romantics...No college party was complete until this song came on. And the good parties played it TWICE!!!!!

Our House, Crosby Stills, Nash and Young...For me and the wife.

I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For, U2...This one has always been "my song" and every year I either find parts of what I'm looking for (the wife) or realize that my search is not over (my job). Good song, many meanings.

Mirror in the Bathroom, English Beat...the song that changed my life and opened my eyes musically. From here on out, I was the guy my friends went to, to find out about new music.

3 Little Birds (Don't Worry, About a Thing...) Bob Marley...This song always gets me through the tough times. It ALWAYS cheers me up.

And probably anything by the Polyphonic Spree. They've got to be the happiest band on the planet. Is it drugs? Are they a cult? I don't really care. It's like the cast of Jesus Christ Superstar meets Sid and Marty Krofft as they go to a Grateful Dead concert.

I'll bet there are plenty of other songs that I've left off my list, and of course, they'll pop into my head late at night..but I'll keep it as it is for now.
Make your own lists at home, it's easy, fun and free.

Tuesday, August 09, 2005

Mecca (Part II)

Farmer's markets. They changed my life. When I was in the restaurant biz, I almost never cooked...well, actually, I would cook, but it usually consisted of re-heating whatever foods I had pilfered from the restaurant: burritos (and all sorts of Mexican "hand-foods"), burgers, ribs...stuff like that. I'd get a salad at work every now and then, but that was pretty much it for my veggie intake. I also liked a lot of fast food.
When you come home at 2:00 am and wake up at noon, your meal schedule gets all messed up and you just sort of eat what and when you can.
On the bright side, being on your feet and running around for 12 hours a day helps you really burn off a lot of extra calories. Plus, drinking black coffee all day long does wonders for your metabolism...but not for your stomach.

Fast forward a few years and I've finally quit the restaurant biz. I'm also out of work and collecting unemployment. Sounds bad, no? Well, the wife has a great, well-paying job, we live in a nice, cute apt. in SF, a couple of blocks from the bay, with shopping, restaurants and all the neighborhood necessities within short walking distance.

So, my "job" became house and wife maintenance. The house part was easy. At about noon, I'd get really fidgety (the was coffee really kicking in) and I'd grab the vacuum, the duster, and the lemon pledge and get to work on the house. And if I got really motivated, I'd re-organize a closet. It was quite tiring and took a lot of energy, but the wife really loved the results.
Cooking, on the other hand, relaxed me. I would head to the corner market, look at the fresh veggies and grab a head of broccoli, then I'd move to the meat dept and get some boneless skinless chicken breasts. Some days, I'd grab a head of lettuce and make a simple salad. Nothing to fancy, yet.

I think I forgot another piece in this puzzle. During this time, our cable company added the Food Network to our tv package. You cannot overestimate the impact this had on me. Now, I've had a love/hate relationship with this entity, some shows are great, others worthless, but for pure food porn, nothing at the time could beat it. I was hooked.
I started to collect recipes. I expanded my kitchen tools to include all the best pots, pans, utensils, appliances etc...the works. Within reason, of course. I didn't need the egg coddler or the avocado slicer. And I especially didn't need the bagel slicer. I'll slice my own bagels, thank you very much!

Just some good knives, great pots and pans, and a well stocked pantry and I was ready to "kick it up a notch" as someone once said (every night, 7 nights a week, 8pm pst)

My shopping habits started to change as well. Broccoli was still in the mix, but now so was cauliflower, brussels sprouts, asparagus, artichokes, squash, peas, carrots, onions, shallots, leeks, garlic, sweet potatoes, spinach, cabbage, and corn. (I'm sorry if I left you out, but just remember, all of you are winners)
All fresh and bought daily. I was also starting to notice that my food decisions were becoming based on the seasons, the farmers, and the methods to get these foods to the market.

Although the local market had a great variety of produce, and an organic/free range meat dept, I felt that something was missing from my shopping. Cooking and food shopping were starting to become more of a lifestyle and less of a daily task. I needed to make decisions that reflected my new-found philosophy of seasonal, organic, and sustainable foods. Something had to change. I had the time and energy to seek out new ways for my latest hobby to develop.

Now we can finally get to the farmer's market...and the Ferry Building.
But maybe tomorrow. I'm hungry and it's time for lunch.

Monday, August 08, 2005

The Bushman


Beware the Bushman!

Here's the deal...in the Fisherman's Wharf area, there's this man who hides behind his own tree branch on the sidewalk and scares the crap out of tourists as they walk by. It's really harmless fun and most people play along with the joke, but the guy does have a bodyguard near-by in case someone didn't pack their sense of humor on the trip. Traditionally, after you get scared (and leave a few coins in his jar) you move to the other side of the street with the rest of the tourists and wait for the next unsuspecting fellow. He can attract large crowds during the summer, so if you're walking along down fisherman's wharf, and you see a crowd of people staring at you...LOOK OUT!!! The bushman might be waiting, ready to pounce.

Restaurant Reviews

My bro-in-law and his wife and kid live in the East Bay. His wife's parents were in town paying a visit and they all wanted to meet in SF for some dinner. So, it's August, Saturday night, dinner time...where would be a good place to meet, park, pick a restaurant and grab a quick meal?
How about Fisherman's Wharf?
Hmm, let's see--crowded, no parking, hour-long wait for dinner, touristy (non-authentic) restaurants plus, (PLUS!!) we had an 18 month-old child with us.
Hey, I didn't pick the area.
So, to make a long story short(er) I hopped on Muni and met the rest of the group at Rainforest Cafe for dinner. The wait was 90 minutes. This didn't work for me, nor for anyone else. We fanned out, cellphones at the ready, and started to check in with all of the other restaurants in the area. It didn't look too promising.

Suddenly, from out of the blue, my phone rang...it was Mrs. notjoey, and she found a place that could seat us asap! Nick's Lighthouse, right on the actual wharf.
It's a small, square dining room, with low ceilings, plenty of nautical jetsam and flotsam hanging from the walls, old crusty waiters (except for our server) uncomfortable booths, and views of old fishing boats bobbing in the bay. I'll bet the place hasn't changed much since the 50's.
There were 8 of us and we were able to get a table after only waiting 10 minutes.

The wife and I had been there a couple of times recently and found that their crab caesar salads were really quite good. We took a friend there and had a great lunch, so we figured that we would find something worthwhile to eat.

After a servicable lobster bisque, I shared some mussels that were wonderful. Plump, soft and smelling like the (clean) ocean, they were served in a white wine, tomato parsley sauce that went great with the crusty sourdough bread that was brought to the table. I was starting to like this place a bit more now. You see, to a local SF-er, Fisherman's Wharf is where you take out-of-towners for some "Ye Olde SF Dining" not where you go for good dinner. We end up there a couple of times a year, usually with guests, and if you pay attention, you can get a pretty good deal.

I ordered the "Lazy Man's" Cioppino for my entree. It's a seafood stew of shrimp, crab, scallops, mussels, clams, and fish in a tomato-sherry broth that was pleasantly mild and didn't overpower the seafood at all. It's "lazy" because they take all of the shells off for you. No crab claws to crack, clam and mussel shells are not in your bowl, giving you more room for the seafood...you get the idea. Your shirt will be happy. It's great for a date or a business dinner.
There were 3 kinds of shrimp in the bowl: rock shrimp, small bay shrimp, and prawn-like big boys with the tails still on.
There was so much food I "literally" couldn't eat it all. (some day I'll write about the misuse/overuse of the word "literally"...it's like a virus)

All of us were quite satisfied with our entrees. Plus...PLUS, the service was quite good. As a former restaurant guy, I'm quite familiar with the "tourist trap syndrome" that is quite pervasive in this type of restaurant. As a server, you think you'll never see these people again, and the best way to make $$$ is to turn and burn your tables as fast as you can. Volume, volume, volume! There's really no reason to go out of your way and provide exceptional service (except for the fact that you might CARE ABOUT YOUR WORK AND TAKE PRIDE IN WHAT YOU DO!!!)
So, needless to say, we had pretty good service. My iced tea was filled regularly, the extra plates removed in a timely fashion, and the small child was served first (a must)...all of the small things that you only notice when they're not being done.

So, to sum it all up...
Fisherman's Wharf--we all have to go there sometimes
Nick's Lighthouse--you could do a lot worse, and you may even try it without your guests.

Friday, August 05, 2005

While you (and only you) wait for part 2

I took part in the marches and protests leading up the US war in Iraq. I didn't see the threat. I didn't understand why we were going to Iraq when we still hadn't caught the guy who planned the September 11th attacks. I assumed Saddam had WMDs, but I figured you go to war because of what you know, not what you assume. We didn't know for sure and the evidence didn't convice me, nor did it convince many millions of people around the world.

Why am I telling you this? I found this. Click on the red button.
It's a sobering reminder of the cost of war in terms of human life.
And this doesn't include the Iraqi citizens that we're supposed to be liberating.


OK, now back to your regulary scheduled fluff...

Thursday, August 04, 2005

Mecca (part 1)

I’m not a very religious person, heck I’m not really much of a spiritual person. I was raised in a Jewish home, got a decent Jewish education (Sunday school, Hebrew school, Bar Mitzvah) but we never really talked about God, or what he/she was, how it manifested itself in our daily lives, or how we could communicate with God for advice and favors (generally known as “praying” in the Christian world).

Even during my Jewish education period, from 8 years old until I hit 15, I never really caught the God bug. I think it has something to do with the fact that the majority of the population believed in something that I “knew” (and was taught almost on a daily basis) wasn’t true, so it was quite easy for me to eliminate the rest of religion as something that you get to chose, or not.

Plus I liked to ask A LOT of questions. The whole “it comes down to faith” argument never really impressed me. I’m a Virgo, so I’m supposed to be logical, analytical, and skeptical. At least that’s what my astrologer told me, and she’s never wrong!
(I really DO have an analytical mind! And I’m always looking for new ways to challenge myself!! And puppies…I really like puppies)

So, is this some sort of rant, essay, riff (if you will) ,on the President’s latest “Intelligent Design is Good, kids should hear both sides to debates in schools” nonsense?

Well, no.

It’s about Food. To be more specific, where you can see, taste, and buy it. Ok, even more specifically, I’m talking about my very own spiritual center, my Vatican, Wailing Wall, Dome of the Rock, and Jesus on a piece of toast…

The San Francisco Ferry Building (and farmer’s market)

Where to begin? When I moved to SF, in 1996, the building was just offices…and the ferry landing. The farmer’s market was located a couple of blocks away, in a parking lot.
Then I heard that “they” (the mysterious city people) were going to refurbish the building, return the farmers market to the area in and around the ferry plaza and fill the building interior with gourmet shops, food stands and the like. Like the Pike Place Market in Seattle and Granville Island in Vancouver (BC).

I was intrigued.

My mom made home-cooked meals almost every night and it was considered a treat to go out to a restaurant. I would watch her make Potato Latkes from scratch, the smell of onions filling up the house, quickly followed by the aroma of fried potatoes.
She would make other traditional Jewish/Eastern European foods as well;
Stuffed Cabbage, Rugulah, Tsimmis, chopped liver and everyone’s favorite--
Beef Tongue. These dishes were the exception, not the rule, but she was/is a good cook always looking to try new cuisines (tonight, Chow Mein, tomorrow, Tacos)

I guess what I’m trying to say here is that I was exposed to different foods as a child and it must’ve rubbed off on me in some way. I like to consider myself an adventurous food eater. Like Tony Bourdain without the travel budget…and the classical chef’s training.

Then I got into the restaurant business. It’s not what you think. Trust me, I know what you’re thinking, and it’s not that. I worked for suburban chain restaurants. Think Chili’s, Friday’s or for you “Office Space” fans, it was just like Chotchkie's …and yes, I made sure my staff wore the proper flair.

We made burgers, burritos, bbq ribs, and every trendy appetizer that hit the market—Potato skins! Chicken Wings! Jalapeño Poppers!
(this was the 80’s and these were still new and exciting foods)
I worked in the “front of the house” (not the kitchen) and had a staff of up to 100 employees. Good times…except when it sucked. And it could really suck.

Anyway…this experience also contributed to my food education. Sure, it was crappy food, usually bland enough not to offend anyone, but it was fresh, fast and priced to move. In other words, you could’ve done a lot worse. This is where I learned my way around a kitchen.

So, what have we got? A guy who grew up in an interesting and challenging food home, became a manager in a chain full-service restaurant, and then moved to one of the greatest food cities in the world.
So I quit the restaurant biz, took about a year off of work, and cooked dinner every night for my wife.

It was during this time I heard about the Ferry Building renovation, and I was excited.


Wednesday, August 03, 2005

the birth


Good Morning. What the hell am I supposed to say here? I read blogs all the time (when I'm not busy working) and always have the witty, charming, funny, sarcastic, insightful and deep responses, comeback, and thoughts, but now that I've got to put my "name" to some of this, I'm drawing the biggest blank you've ever seen drawn...well, except for all of the padding that I've written above.

Ok, quick bio: 40, married, no kids, living in SF, CA. I've got a boring job for a good internet company

Interests: Food/Cooking, Travel, Politics, Pro Sports (real and fantasy) and History.

I'm guess I'm supposed to add lists of my favorite music or concerts, or movies or tv shows to give more insight into what or who I am. Actually all that does is give easy reasons for people to make fun of me...as if there aren't enough already. Oh well, I'll get over that and make some lists anyway. Later. Not now.

Ok, that's it for the first post ever. It's not the greatest, but it only took 10 minutes, so I should get some credit for that...right? Right??? (who am I talking to here?)